30 April 2011
Internet was shot for a bit. Not much change, I'm still depressed, though I think it's getting a little better. I actually laughed at a tv show tonight. Been awhile since that's happened. Still trying for disability, that's adding stress to the situation. Still going to get D's or F's in all but one of my classes. I just have to deal with it. I should pass the one class that was the most important one. Been having issues with sleep. Either I'm asleep by 8:30 and wake up at 11 pm or I'm just awake like I am tonight. One thing's for certain, I've been having the feeling of "why do I have to be alive" lately. It's probably associated with my stubbornness in believing I'll never get into grad school. It kinda hurts to have dreams destroy themselves right in front of your eyes.